Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong, promptly admitted it.
In short, it makes sense that after seeing the cause of your pain, seeing your defects of character to go out and do those things again, it will only lead to more heartache, drug abuse, alcohol abuse, eating, spending, gambling etc. I expected everything to change overnight, but it did not, but it did change slowly. Those fears that tortured me were not torturing me so much. Those resentments would kick in again & scream that those people deserved what they got or how could that person say or do that to me (self-pity). What I did have was a little thought that if I looked at defects and became willing to change, things must get better!
If you break your leg, you know you did it. You are taught by the doctor what you must do in order for those bones to knit together again! You know the cause, you know the effect and you know the solution. But the leg is still broken! So, this is where I see step 10 doing the business! In short, we practice opposites, when fear tells you to turn back; you go forward and face it. When resentment starts justifying its presence, just look at your defects, and look at your reactions! When the past re- emerges, as it will and guilt bites at you again, say “my Higher power forgives me” so don’t believe those guilty thoughts, look for the good, think, “That was then, this is now”.
Things from the past will pop into the mind at the strangest of times. Just write it down and look at it, just as you did in steps 4 and 5. When the depressing feelings come back, say, “You have been here before, so do your business and go when you’re ready”.
Continuing to take an inventory does not mean that you become self-obsessed, it means, just look, observe, but don’t get involved with those thoughts that say, “The best way not to fail is not to try”. The S.A.S, their motto is, “Who dares wins” a spiritual motto is, “Who cares wins”.
I get ratty at times but I say I am sorry promptly, and let that be the end of it. If you are feeling resentful, fearful or angry say, ”What is going on in my life?”. “What has changed between now and the last time you were happy?”, “What is going on in your life?”..